It’s not Fair!!!!
Hi 6A,
please submit your responses to “It’s not Fair!!!”
I look forward to reading your thoughts. Please read two peers’ writing and give them feedback about their piece of writing.
Ms J
6 Aleph 2012
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July 16th, 2012 at 3:13 pm
Some live their life with it all, yet they live life always wanting and only thinking about them. Way on the other side of the world there are young children just like them almost dying of starvation and poverty. Not having much at all, yet they are so grateful for every little thing they have. From waking up in the morning, down to the last little drop of water that falls on their dried up mouths. Some wake up in the morning being forced to go to boring old school five days a week bored to death. That’s how they think of it. Way on the other side of the world there are children wishing they could go to school every day, though they are waking up in the mornings forced to go to work to help support their families. They have to walk miles just to find just enough water to keep their families living; don’t forget the water is full of death diseases. Think about what you have. Step in the shoes of the children living in poverty, that have a lot less than you, and then talk.
Tayla Karp
July 16th, 2012 at 3:14 pm
Hi Miss J,
That’s Not Fair
* When you get blamed for something you didn’t do.
* When your sibling gets a present on your birthday.
* Cruelty to animals.
* When adults judge you before you even have done anything.
* Because your sibling messed up something your parents don’t let you try.
* When your parent can make decisions for themselves but kids can’t make decisions for themselves.
* When kids can’t have a little bit of freedom.
* When the youngest child doesn’t get treated equally.
* When animals get killed so people can eat them.
* That people don’t get treated fairly.
* When people are too lazy to put the rubbish in the bin so it end up polluting the earth.
* That you need to be a certain age to move out, or vote, e.g.
* When people get bullied because they didn’t do anything to the bully.
Manz
July 16th, 2012 at 3:14 pm
It’s not fair!
- it’s not fair that people throw out food because they think it is “YUCKY” or because they are “FUSSY” or some people are so “SPOILED,” while others starve to death, and don’t get education because they are so slim that they can barely move or they have to not go to school so they can try to find food for the family. Don’t you think that is not fair!! Next time you think of throwing out food, think of these people who starve to death!
- It’s not fair that kids get bullied and come home feeling miserable and then all then once the bad talk about themselves start getting repeated they start thinking it is true, and once something has been said it is hard to get it off your mind. If you are being bullied speak to a councillor! If you have seen someone been bullied TELL SOMEONE because witnessing bulling and not doing anything about it is just as guilty as the bullier!!
monique
July 16th, 2012 at 3:15 pm
It’s not fair
“Sophie go to your room” Screamed her mum angrily “but mum I didn’t do it, it’s not fair” Replied Sophie “then who was it that went on your computer and wrote a 500 page novel about how I discriminate you” Shouted her mum “Oh that yes that was me but the cracked glasses wasn’t me it was Jack” Explained Sophie “Don’t start saying it was your one legged blind deaf brother Jack for your actions” interrupted Sophie’s mum “why don’t you ever believe me it’s not fair” Demanded Sophie.
Liron Nowesenitz
July 16th, 2012 at 5:33 pm
Hi,
I think you used “it’s not fair” well, by doing it on being blamed for something you didn’t do.
You should of edited it with more effort because you need to go on to a new line for a new speaker which you didn’t do.
Well done!!
Monique.
July 16th, 2012 at 3:15 pm
It’s Not Fair
• Siblings get presents on your birthday
• People talk over you
• Being find
• Siblings come into your room
• You get blamed for something you didn’t do
• People talk behind your back
• People spy on you / listen to your conversations
• You have tried your hardest in something and the teacher says try harder
• Your dad doesn’t let you cross a road by yourself
• You have to clean your siblings mess
• Animal cruelty
• Your mum buys so much clothes for your sister and non for you
• Someone in the same year as you having a party at the same place as you
July 16th, 2012 at 3:16 pm
IT’S NOT FAIR!- DISCRIMINATION
“It’s not fair that I am different!”
“It’s not fair that I can’t go and play with others not my colour.”
“I don’t understand that someone can’t change this situation and make a difference. Just once would change me as a person.”
“How would they feel if they were in my shoes, would they cry? Would they scream.”
“I would love to go and play with someone like myself, someone like my race, someone that would understand how I feel every day and every night.”
“I wish the world could open up and see who I am, I want to be heard and known and be proud and stand up for who I am. They wouldn’t understand how much my heart is broken, I want to be like every other person and be the same.”
“I want to be able to do what other children not my race but white children get to do every day and never getting into trouble.”
“The white’s treat us like nothing I don’t want to feel every day that I am stepped on; I am the colour of the dirt not the colour of the sky! The white people look up to the sky but walk on the dirt, I feel like an ant that wants to be heard that doesn’t want to be stepped on. I want to be IMPORTANT.”
“I am like all other children not different, one day we will all be the same and all be together. We have separate trains and football grounds and even toilets! I say, we get treated differently and don’t have equal rights. Can you tell me or someone in the world that will listen to my voice “Why are we not the same?”
“My life is feels like a dark cloud wanting to let all the tears out of itself, someone please just listen to me, please.”
Gabsy xx
July 16th, 2012 at 5:20 pm
Wow i totally agree with yours great language and i could see you were expressing what you thought and maybe what others feel too. xx Milla
July 16th, 2012 at 8:23 pm
That was great. I loved how explained how black people are no different to white.
July 16th, 2012 at 8:28 pm
But you do know that blacks are not discriminated that much any more, but still that was great.
July 18th, 2012 at 10:13 pm
I think you did a great job and you really made me think what it would be like to be in the shoes of someone who is facing discrimination.
July 16th, 2012 at 3:16 pm
“That’s not fair!” every god damn morning waking up to the same stuff, makes me so mad! That little bugger is ruining my life. He’s not even nice just a little bother of a brother who has not contributed to my family in any way whatsoever! Every day I wake up at four with a giant scream of “That’s not fair!” at the top of his premature but surprisingly loud lungs always something that’s wrong with him. Whether the school party was cancelled or even something as stupid as his pillow being too hard. I feel bad for him and it must be hard to have one arm but why does he have to bring everyone else down with him. I hate Kade!
“Jeremy, wake up, it’s time for brekkie” “Don’t worry mum I’ve been up for hours” That Kade has been a nuisance for me sleeping wise for about two years his depressed life has brought down the whole family. Of course Kade is a nice kid and we all feel sympathetic towards him at time but as time passes, we all came to despise him more and more. He constantly raves about what a terrible time his having because of his arm, the therapist tells him to try and overcome this difficulty and not victimise himself and always make himself feel like he’s less important, he took that badly.
One day at school I was with my friends and I saw Kade just sitting alone eating lunch by himself. I hesitated but I decided to confront him it was horrible to watch as kids were running around messing about and Kade was making himself feel lonely. “Hey Kade why aren’t you playing with your friends?” “No one likes me they think I’m a freak. “At that moment something snapped I just completely lost my cool. “Are you kidding me! You always have to be a victim don’t you?
My story so far…
July 16th, 2012 at 5:41 pm
Hi,
I think your story was good and it made me feel sorry for kade but understanding how you would feel about him annoying you. You should have put a bit more effort in the editing part of it because you didn’t put a new line for a new speaker.
Good job!!
Monique
July 16th, 2012 at 3:17 pm
“It’s not fair”
• It’s not fair when my Dad favours my brother because he is the only boy in the house and because he is the youngest.
• It’s not fair when my Dad screams at my puppy because she was upstairs with me and I told Juicy to come upstairs.
• It’s not fair when I get blamed when someone else did something wrong.
• It’s not fair when people waist food or if you don’t like something you throw it out.
• It’s not fair when people steal friends away from you.
• It’s not fair when someone brags about their money to others.
• It’s not fair when people talk about you behind your back.
• It’s not fair to litter because it sometimes can kill animals and maybe sometimes people.
• It’s not fair that people have no money and are living on the streets with nothing.
• It’s not fair to bully people because it puts that person down.
• It’s not fair to write or disagree with peoples beliefs.
• It’s not fair that we have such good education and some kids and adults have very very pour amount of education.
xx MILLA
July 16th, 2012 at 8:16 pm
I think that you did a lot of good “It’s not fairs” but I think that all of them were pointing at real life examples and a few fantasy examples would have also been nice. I think you worded your ideas very well and I like the way that these are problems that happen in real life and can be resolved if everybody works together. In conclusion I think you did a very good job and I may even be interested in using some of these ideas if we do this same writing task again.
July 16th, 2012 at 3:17 pm
“I buzz the bed on the right,” said Megan.
“It’s not fair!” screamed Derp.
“How,” replied Megan.
“That every time we go on a holiday you always choose which bed is yours,” said Derp.
“Fine, you come downstairs and choose which bed you want,” answered Megan.
“OK I will,” said Derp.
2 MINUTES LATER
“I want the bed on the left,” exclaimed Derp.
“That’s what I wanted you have the whole time,” replied Megan.
“Shut up,” said Derp.
July 16th, 2012 at 3:18 pm
It’s not fair when:
I prove an adult wrong and they don’t acknowledge it.eg.
“So if 8×4 is 34 then what is 8×5?” questioned Miss Joubert.
“Miss Joubert isn’t 8×4 32?” asked Adam politely.
“Adam don’t interrupt me and be quiet while I’m speaking! Moving on class please take out your text books” snapped Miss Joubert changing the subject.
My mother doesn’t trust me with something because one of my brothers was irresponsible.eg.
“Mum can I use my iPod for 10 minutes in my bed tonight?” asked Adam politely.
“No because last time I let your older brother use his iPod at night he stayed up on it for 2 more hours.” replied his mother.
I meet somebody from a different country either in Australia or overseas and they always judge me because I am Australian. These are normally the first questions I here.
“Is it true you ride kangaroos to school?”
“Do you sleep with a koala?”
“Do you have wallaby for dinner?”
When I am not allowed to do something because I am not old enough but my two older brothers are and when I am not allowed to do something because I am too old and big but my younger brother and cousins are.
July 16th, 2012 at 3:18 pm
That’s Not Fair
At football it was Ajax playing Cheltenham at La Page Park. The player I was on was being discriminatory by talking about my religion. Discrimination is not fair because I was born Jewish. People can’t choose what religion they want to be, like they can’t choose what they look like, their skin colour and where they were born. You can’t just say you don’t like them because of their religion, get to know them. We need to gain an understanding of other cultures, religions and race because if there was only one culture or religion the world would be a boring place.
July 16th, 2012 at 3:19 pm
Its crazy how some people think life should always be fair? Don’t you? Well I am here to tell why I think life shouldn’t always be fair.
Its obvious everyone knows that when you don’t get what you want you ALWAYS think it is unfair! Here are a few examples of what unfair really is.
1. There are people starving in 3rd world countries and dyeing because they have no food! Now “that’s not fair!’
2. In some stores women get paid less then and that is call gender discrimination! And “that’s not fair!”
3. Think about homeless people living on the streets in the freezing cold with no jacket and no warm blanket! Now “that’s just not fair!”
Would you like it if you were living in these terrible conditions with no food and no home? Well im sure you would NOT like it!
After reading my speech I hope you will listen to what I say and take what you have for granted and life cant always be fair.
July 16th, 2012 at 6:21 pm
hi Jazzy,
i think that you have explained the real unfair and what you think is unfair very well,
you have really thought into it
well done
simmi
July 16th, 2012 at 8:21 pm
I think that you are right. People complain every single day that they don’t like whats for dinner when there are people that don’t even get dinner. I think this could be a motivational speech because it tells us about whats REALLY not fair in our world. I like the example you gave about gender discrimination because I agree with you. Why do women get payed less? Now that is unfair!
July 16th, 2012 at 3:19 pm
That not fair when by brother is a lawed to boss me around and make me do what ever he wants me to do for him. I wander if I had a older sister would she fill as bosses as my brother or not. I recon that she will be why niser then my brother I hope.
Adam Blumberg
July 16th, 2012 at 3:20 pm
That’s not fair
The post man going past streets plopping envelopes in the mail boxes. “Where’s that invitation I am waiting for”? I am mad, frustrated and desperate. I suddenly hear a motorbike go past our house. I have a sneak peek out side to see if there is any mail yet. I am absolutely scream madly. I get two invitations one from my Israeli friend and one for my best friend in Melbourne. I am wishing for them to be on different days. I open the door to go inside the house to get a letter opener to open my invitations. “NO NO NO THIS CANT BE. THERE ON THE SAME DAY”.
July 16th, 2012 at 3:20 pm
That’s Not Fair!
He had warned her about this…. Now he was angry. “WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO LOUD?” He took that back knowing he said that a bit loud. “MAX STOP SCREAMING” His Dad begun “YOU WOKE UP YOUR MOTHER AND SHE HAS TO GET UP IN AT 6:00AM! He stepped out of my bed and marched into his sisters’ room. She stared at him and in answer he closed the door. “Why did yo-“she started until I cut her off “When you wake up in the middle of the night because you need a pee you do not have to BANG EVERY DOOR IN THE HOUSE! OKAY? IT’S NOT FAIR! THERE ARE OTHER PEOPLE IN THIS HOUSE THAT ARE TRYING TO SLE-“ “ MAX DON’T MAKE ME COME OVER THERE ME AND YOUR MOTHER ARE TRYING TO SLEEP OKAY!” Max looked into Jessica’s eyes, “Don’t do it again or else….” As Max walked out of the room he heard a little squeak that sounded like a laugh…. But not Jessica’s laugh……
The next day Max woke up to see the sun light coming from his blinds, “What the?” Max started to think. He was sure he closed his blind last night and his family knows he can’t sleep with the blind open. Max looked at the clock 7:00PM. This must have been the work of he’s sister. “It’s not fair” Max kept saying over and over making sure he didn’t scream. After Max had calmed himself down he attempted to go to sleep again, only to find himself tossing and turning in his doona. After a long period of time Max had decided that he would not get back to sleep. He looked over to his bed side table 8:15AM. Max had given up. He decided to go check on his little sister; she was 6 and was named Gemma. He walked into her room but couldn’t find her. Max decided to look if she was downstairs. Max walked down the steep steps and counted 14 steps from the top of the house to the bottom. When he reached the floor Max took a step onto the cold tiles and his feet felt like ice. He decided to run to the Living room where the television was, there was carpet there. When he reached the living room he almost fainted when he got the shock of his little sister sitting in the living room watching television. “Hi Max how did you sleep” Gemma giggled. What did she mean, Max was thinking, why is she laughing? “Hmmm….. Why are you so giggly?” I exclaimed “Ohhh I can’t keep a secret anymore! Jessica and I were purposefully doing those things! I’m sorry we just thought it would be funny!” Max stood still. Thinking. He thought for about a minute and then started to speak, they made a plan. A plan to get Jessica. And before they knew it, it was time.
Jessica woke to the sound of nothing. She started thinking it was too quite. When she finally forced her eyes open she couldn’t see anything. “MUM! IM BLINED!” Screams Jessica. “HAHAHAHAHAHHA!” Jessica heard what sounded like two people laughing. Then she could see Max and Gemma sitting on her bed. “You traitor!” Shouted Jessica pointing at Gemma. Then they all laughed. “GUYS BE QUITE!” They continued to laugh until tears came out of their eyes.
The End
July 16th, 2012 at 5:23 pm
I like it but too long but any way i like how you wrote a story and it has a lot of emotions and its made sense and it made me understand what you were trying to write about.
xx Milla
July 16th, 2012 at 8:26 pm
Damn gid. Now that was a lot & I loved it.
July 16th, 2012 at 3:21 pm
That’s not fair 16th July 2012.
Look at the world. What has it become of it? Suffering, racism, poverty. It’s not fair.
When you walk down the street, what do you see? Homelessness suffering, it’s not fair.
Look through the hustling streets of the city and into dark allies, what do you find? A black being abused and teased for the colour of their skin. It’s not fair.
How would you feel if everyday at lunch time you would huddle in the corner and hide from reality, Because you were different and too scared to face it.
Put yourself in their shoes. How would you feel? How would you like it? Help. Make a change.
July 16th, 2012 at 9:32 pm
Ella, WOW! Amazing writing! Your writing really was engaging. You used exactly the right words that were necessary. I love your writing!
Tattie xxx
July 19th, 2012 at 6:02 pm
Ella that was amazing, it really grabbed my attention.
Manz
July 19th, 2012 at 8:37 pm
Hi Ella Bella,
WOW, that was so powerful. It might have been pretty short but it finished with a BANG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Round of applause. A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!
Timnah
July 16th, 2012 at 3:22 pm
Last year at my old school,
I walked into the art room crying because I had just found out that my grandmother had died, and a boy came up to me and comforted me asking me what happened and if there was something he could do etc. I walked to my table with my best friend by my side and decided that I wanted to sit next to her and just talk to her, after a while of utter silence and hard work, I heard the rest of the table talking about grandparents and relatives etc. and they were going round and saying how many relatives/grandparents they had. When it came to me and I didn’t want to say because then that would just start the tears again. I just ignored them and moved on with my work. After a while because my best friend (seeing she is like a sister to me) asked them to change the subject because I had started to cry again. But the boy at the other end refused and asked me again how many grandparents I had, I figured that if I told him he would lack of me so I told him that the only grandparent I had left was my mother’s father my grandfather, because my grandparents on my father’s side perished very soon after my oldest brother was born 16 years ago. I think this fits under the category of “it’s unfair” because it is unfair that because the boy had never lost anyone, he didn’t know how it felt to lose someone.
July 16th, 2012 at 5:17 pm
THAT’S NOT FAIR!!!
“One more sleep to my slumber party!! Mum, please can you buy me chips, chocolate and ice cream”
“Of course, anything for you Madison. I will go after dinner tonight and remember to get your room organised now because your friends are coming at 10:00 tomorrow morning.”
“Sure Mum, but you better not cancel it like last time for a silly reason.”
Last time I had a sleep over my Mum got dates mixed up and had to cancel my slumber because we had do go to my MUM’S friend’s house, I mean SERIOUSLY.
“There we go Beds are made, room cleaned DONE.”
“Dinners ready!” called Mum
“COMING”
After dinner I go straight to my room for an early night so I am up bright and early for my slumber.
In the morning I wake up and it’s a bit cold I walk along our red and green velvet rug that Grandpa brought back from Spain.
When I walk in the room I find Mum sitting on the couch on the phone. When mum hung up I asked her..
“What’s wrong Mum?”
“Madison, I’m sorry but I had cancelled your slumber because I mean look outside it flooding so the roads are blocked.”
“BUT THAT’S NOT FAIR!!!”
July 16th, 2012 at 6:10 pm
Hey Ethan,
In one of your sentences you wrote ” Thats what I wanted you have the whole time.” It doesn’t make sense! You need to go over your work again and fix it up! DONT RUSH! otherwise good grammar and well done.
Gabsy
July 16th, 2012 at 6:14 pm
Tattie,
your writing was amazing i agreed with everything you said. you are a fantastic writer.
July 16th, 2012 at 6:15 pm
Hi Simmi,
In one of your sentences after you put the full stop you didn’t put a capital letter. You need to check over it and NO RUSHING! Otherwise really good job i thought that you told the story under the subject of ” IT NOT FAIR!” Well done!
Gabsy x
July 16th, 2012 at 6:20 pm
Really good works everybody you all did a fantastic job!
Just a little letter for the class! <3
Gabsy xx
July 16th, 2012 at 6:33 pm
the only thing i didn’t agree on was ‘its not fair when my sibblings walk into my room’ but other wise it was a good list.
July 16th, 2012 at 7:34 pm
TATTIE:
Wow yours is amazing. I really felt that i need to do something so quickly so they live happy and heathy lives.
great job.
I love the words you used and how you put them together.
Hannah
July 16th, 2012 at 7:40 pm
SIMMI:
That is so true what you said knowing he dosent know what it feels like loosing someone so close to you and you family and friends.
I think it is reall good shearing that story with the whole class
GOOD JOB
Hannah
July 16th, 2012 at 7:56 pm
The colour of my skin is the same colour as the Earth.
When some people’s skin is like the clouds in the sky, mine is like soil on which we walk on. People look up to the clouds but look down to the earth. People look up to “normal white people” but down on us…. The Black’s.
In the playground I blend into the back ground. Or that is what I am told. I do not believe that is true. I believe people just want it to seem as if it is true. As if I am the trees, or the grass or the birds so they do not have to be around me. But I believe I am a human being no matter what they say. I am on my own most of the time but that does not bring my hopes down. I will change the world one day. Make this word a better place.
At home in our street we are surrounded by the colour of the “clouds”. None of the people in our street talk to us, well except for one, the blind old lady down the street. But she is blind and does not know the colour of our skin. No one would know our colour if everyone was blind. They would just think we were kind white people because all blacks have to be terrible people, right? It is as if we are in the middle of nowhere by ourselves with no one to talk to. Except for the blind lady down the street.
It is like that everywhere I go. Everywhere.
Have you ever felt different or like you do not belong? Because if you have, you know exactly how I feel…….It is not fair.
Timnah
July 16th, 2012 at 8:36 pm
OMG!!!! that was amaziiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnggggggggg. Honestly that was mind blowing. I loooovvvvvveeeeedddddd how you explained that Black skin coloured people are no different to white. But you do know that blacks aren’t discriminated that much any more, but still amazing.
July 16th, 2012 at 8:10 pm
Hey Hannah
I thought it was really good but when it said i am absolutely scream madly it didn’t make any sence but other than that it was really good.
Sam
July 16th, 2012 at 8:19 pm
Hey Gidon
I thought it was really good you had really good grammar but it was really long it didn’t have to be so long but other then that it was good.
Sam
July 16th, 2012 at 8:35 pm
ELLA:
Your coment to tattie was really nice but you dont hace capital letters.
Hannah
July 19th, 2012 at 5:53 pm
It’s Not Fair:
* When you get blamed for something you didn’t do.
* That we kill animals so that we can eat them.
* Not everyone in the world gets the same medical attention the we do.
* Not everyone is as lucky as we are.
* Not everyone gets a roof over there head.
Manz